Jim Rohn once said, “You are the average of the five people
you spend the most time with.”
Let me guess. You have your immediate family, maybe a
significant other, and then you have your friends.
College isn’t the “best four years of your life” because you
earned a diploma, spent all night partying, or figured out what you want to do.
It’s because those years are filled with friendships, acquaintances, and
creating memories that you’ll remember for a lifetime. You meet the people who
are supposed to have your back through thick and thin, who you know will be
celebrating with you at your wedding, and the ones that will be sitting beside
you in a wheel chair.
As best as we know it, school has always been a huge
facilitator in meeting people whether you know them from class, or they live
down the hall, or they’re in the same sorority or fraternity as you. Those four
years you’ve spent together are suddenly going to be different after
graduation…..Well if you let them.
Before graduation it feels like everyone’s in the same place
and everyone’s moving in sync. You graduate with your closest friends by your
side, you take that crazy trip you’ve always wanted to take, and now you’re
ready to conquer the world. Well suddenly you might find that in your circle of
friends all your lives are suddenly changing independent of one another. Some
work long work weeks, others decide to move to a foreign country, and you
slowly feel that sense of drifting.
As you get older, your priorities change, you gain more
responsibilities, and you unconsciously become more selective about who you
want to spend your time with. While you may think about your closest friends
everyday, you probably don’t get around to calling or texting them because you
can think of a million other things that need to be done before you go to bed.
Well let me tell you
this: It takes two. To maintain any type of relationship it’s going to take
effort on both of your sides. Not
just yours and not just theirs.
Don’t be the friend who is always invited to things, but
never plans anything on their own. If planning isn’t “your thing,” then make it
your thing if you care about staying in touch. Be a giver. Be understanding. Don’t
let your friendships fade because you were too tired or too busy because I
guarantee you won’t regret it once you’re sitting across the table from an old
friend catching up over lost time.
It saddens me to say this, but I can’t even count how many
times I’ve browsed my Facebook feed to see that someone I went to high school
with passed away last week, or that someone I’ve been meaning to make plans
with moved across the country. I can’t stress it enough. Seriously - make an
effort before it’s too late.
I agree. It’s extremely hard to keep up with your own life,
while also trying to keep up with everyone else’s..but one hour every Tuesday
is only .59% of your week. So pick up your phone, send out a card, make some
plans, and schedule time to call an old friend this week. That’s less than 1%
of your week. Come on. No excuses.
Out of all the investments you will make in your life,
building a relationship will be the single most important. It may not be
costly, per say, but it will take time, effort, and hopefully a lot of emotions
as well. Invest your kindness, and invest your interests in the people around
you. No amount of money will make up for the feeling of loneliness on the big
events in your life if you don’t have true friends to celebrate it with.
